Over the years I’ve written and talked a great deal about the education of the whole child. I’ve wondered, as I’ve watched our kids in the classrooms, on the athletic fields, on stage, in the art room, and in other areas, what is it that they take from their experience here? While many of our alumni and current students speak of the importance of their relationships with their teachers and coaches, what else allows them to go on to succeed?

This past weekend I got a little insight into that question when I attended the 2007 Athletic Hall of Fame Dinner at Harvard University, at which twelve new members were inducted. As I listened to the presentations I was amazed at the incredible talents, skills, and accomplishments of these athletes. Perhaps the most impressive part about them is that, as good as they were as athletes, they are even more impressive as people. You cannot imagine how exciting it was to be there and to have the privilege to present two of the people whom I coached, Jenny Holleran and Jeremy Fraiberg.

All of the athletes, women and men, are hardworking, driven, and motivated. Although each has his or her own individual story and perspective about accomplishments, in their presentations, there were underlying themes that surfaced for all of them that can be useful for all of us and are applicable to everything we do. Jenny Holleran noted the following:

• Every person on the team matters, is critical to the success of the team, and needs to feel valued. 
  We should use our strengths to help others grow.

• Anything is possible—as a team, if we push ourselves and our teammates beyond our and their perceived limits, we can accomplish anything we set out to do.

• We should dedicate ourselves to the things we believe in. We should prepare relentlessly and then have the courage to put ourselves fully on the line to try to achieve our goals.

Jeremy Fraiberg said that he “learned a tremendous amount about friendship, discipline, and character. I formed close relationships with my teammates, who were an incredibly talented and hilarious group of guys. . . . Most importantly, though, the experience helped me to develop my character. I learned the importance of placing fairness above everything else. It is a lesson that I will never forget.” Lessons in fairness and character: this is the reason that at Shipley we place a high value on athletics in the development of the whole child.

An additional, and perhaps the most crucial, attribute that seemed to carry Jenny, Jeremy, and all of the other honorees to their success is their ability to deal with adversity and disappointment. Although each was very motivated to win, all spoke about the lessons learned from losing. Whether it was suffering a devastating loss in a game, not playing up to their ability, getting injured, or some other type of disappointment, they all talked about the need to use disappointment as an opportunity for growth.

Jeremy acknowledged his experience in an email to me in which he recounted a loss that made him feel particularly dejected. He realized that if he continued as he was and let this loss tear him apart, it would pull him and his teammates down. As he said, “I chewed on it for a while and realized . . . I needed to take responsibility and step up to do the work with a renewed focus and determination.”

Implicitly, if not explicitly, this speaks to the attitude we take into any situation. Do we see the glass half empty or half full? Quite often when we see the glass as half empty, we look at losses and disappointments as crises; when we do this it becomes much more difficult to grow and learn. If we see the glass as half full, we look for the best to come from any experience and see it as an opportunity.

At Shipley, our commitment to the whole child, our desire to become the most open, supportive, and caring community possible, and our desire to produce students who strive for excellence and develop a love of learning and compassionate participation in the world are all about seeing the glass as half full. If we look at our students and children with optimism and hope, we have a chance of reinforcing optimism and hope in them. Let us help our kids to see themselves and the world as glasses half full. Even on those occasions when we are disappointed in them or must hold them accountable for things they have (or have not) done, we need to give them hope to move forward in a positive and productive manner. Attitude does matter, and our belief in our children is essential to their ultimate growth.

The last couple of weeks of school will leave us with many opportunities to celebrate our students’ accomplishments. Thanks for making the 2006-07 school year such a good one. I hope that the summer provides all of you with opportunities for growth, revitalization, and fun. May your glass be forever full!

Warmest regards,

Steven S. Piltch
Head of School

P.S. Our lockdown drill on Friday, May 18th went extremely well and we and the Lower Merion Police were very pleased. Superintendent Daly told Channel 10 that Shipley is a model of preparedness among Lower Merion schools. We will continue to have these drills from time to time because we believe that the safety of our staff and students is of the highest importance. Thank you for your cooperation.